Vivien in Conversation with Rob Thomas – How to Deepen Intimacy Without Saying a Word

What if the very words you’re using to fix your relationship are the problem? Backed by science and tested with couples across the country, Rob’s “wordless” approach isn’t about romance clichés or sexual intimacy—it’s about creating alignment, vulnerability, and lasting connection.

Hello and welcome to The Schapera Show, where Viv and Neil explore this big adventure called life.

Our guest today is rather interesting. Firstly, because the book we are discussing is entitled “Wordless Connection.”

And secondly, wait for it, this book is written by a man.

Let’s welcome Rob Thomas, the author.

Hi, Rob. Thank you for coming on the show.

Hey, Vivian, thank you. And I love the fact I get the shout out for a lot of things. But being a man is certainly not one of them, so I’ll take it. I’ll take it. Thank you.

So Rob, I found your book and your background extremely interesting. And I really, I really mean extremely interesting.

And I would like you to begin with your background because that’s the way we can find out more about you and we can get a little context for your body of work.

So can you tell us more about you?

Sure. I have spent my career working with organizations who are going through change.

And I’ve worked with generally large organizations and whether they’re going through a merger or they’re, most of them are adopting new software across the whole organization. And this is generally not just one country but multiple countries. And I’m helping the employees manage the change.

And part of this is with a communication plan and then identifying what their current job is and in the new situation what their job will be and then helping them make that transition.

So I’ve kind of done that with a lot of organizations and bring in a team and kind of work through that. And I’ve done that in a lot of different industries, a lot of different organizations, a lot of different focuses.

And so it’s been a big adventure. And I think that that’s part of what’s really attracted me.

I like adventure. I like to solve puzzles.

And so I kind of parachute in and have an opportunity to meet people and people are a lot of fun wherever I go.

And that’s kind of the kind of work I’ve done.

It’s very interesting because it sounds a little bit like systems theory, a little bit of working with the system and a lot of communication, needing a lot of communication capacity and helping people with their communication and understanding.

And that’s of my particular interest, both those pieces.

That’s really good.

Now, let’s talk about your book now.

I really was super impressed.

I don’t want to go on a ridiculous amount about how impressed I am with your book, but in my line of work I fall into the personal growth field and I find that generally 90 percent of the participants in personal growth are female and 10 percent are male. I think that might even be a generous percentage that I’m saying here.

And then to be honest, those 10 percent of males who do participate more, they’ve got a very different profile from you, not to say the better or worse or anything, but just different kind of profile.

And so that was another reason that I found your book that interesting and that fascinating.

And then the next reason why I found your book so impressive was because the other relationship book that has impressed me was by Harville Hendricks called “Getting the Love You Want.”

And I found that book more depressing when I first read it. It actually upset me and I put it aside and then about eight, nine months later I thought, “No, I know that book had some truth in it, in fact a lot of truth, and I want to get the benefit of it.”

But it was challenging.

Then I pick up your book and I look at your book and it is uplifting right from the beginning.

It’s empowering right from the beginning.

And then it’s got this amazing message in it that’s very, very relevant.

And so I do want to sing the praises and I do want to acknowledge all of that.

But I’d like you to tell everybody else what’s in your book, Rob? What is your book about?

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Spirit Report: Visit a Galaxy Far Away and Encounter a Life Form

 

Trust begins with trusting this moment. The eternal soul is already taken care of.

Breathe, be still, trust, and inhabit this moment fully.

The purpose of this Shamanic Journey is to travel to the Upper World and ask the beloved compassionate Spirits to take me to a galaxy far, far, far away, and let me see a life form that would be of interest to the listeners

I’m standing on my mountain ledge from which I usually go up.

And the animated totem-like pole has appeared and it’s full of energy and vitality as if it knows that there’s a long long long way that I need to travel for my request of visiting a galaxy very far away and encountering a life form that would be of interest and importance to the listeners of the Schapera show and myself.

And I’m climbing.

As I climb I understand that it’s good for me to put in that effort of climbing.

That’s my role in the shamanic journey to show that I want to go up.

But that the significant journey is not going to be me climbing, but this animated pole, itself going up, and taking me up.

And as I’m climbing I’m hearing various sounds, not the voices that I’ve or animal sounds that I’ve heard before on this animated energy pole that has taken me up, but almost like wind noises.

It’s as if I’m being introduced to the sounds of the galaxy.

And I’m getting a message that has become very important to me recently of don’t rush.

Don’t rush yourself.

Don’t push yourself.

Listen to the entire Schapera Show here.

And I know where I am in the room and that I’ve been doing this journey, and the journey is over, and I thank the Spirits.

Thank you.

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Sunstone: Helps Us Become Unstoppable

Hello and welcome back to The Schapera Show. This is the part of the show where I, Vivien, talk to and about stones and our mineral guest today is Sunstone. Why Sunstone? Because last time we talked to Scolecite, and I mentioned that I combine Scolecite and Sunstone for the rather excellent effect of dissipating the “wet blanket” that accumulates on our energy field due to the dynamic called “empathic resonance.”

Sunstone says we should begin by going over “empathic resonance.” As human beings, when we are functioning within the normal range of the bell curve, we are designed to empathize with our fellow humans. Empathy means that we can identify and resonate with a fellow human’s emotions – in a nutshell, we can feel what another is feeling. When the empathic resonance is one-on-one, it should be mild enough to manage just via recognizing that the emotion belongs to another (or it’s an overreaction). But, when the collective is feeling an emotion, let’s say like disappointment, en masse, then an empath is going to get swamped by these feelings of disappointment. This “swamp” is like a wet blanket on the energy field and prevents the free flow of energy up and down the chakra system. Last time we talked about Scolecite’s contribution to dissolving the wet blanket and this time we’re going to talk about Sunstone’s contribution.

As I infuse the Sunstone/Scolecite combo into the first layer of the energy field, which is done by rubbing the stones on the physical body (incidentally you can do this for yourself at home), I can literally feel the flow of energy begin to ease from the second chakra toward the feet and rise from the second chakra toward the head. This is a remarkable sensation and it is accompanied by a kind of sigh in the energy system, similar to the involuntary sigh we make upon lifting a heavy box. At the same time as the energy system sighs, the client’s face falls into a smile. This is lovely to watch and it gives me a kick every time.

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